The day I embodied my inner mentor

- Nov 08, 2025

Are you familiar with the concept of the 'inner mentor'? What if I talk about a higher self? Perhaps you'll get an image in your mind, subtle, in passing, of an older Gandalf-like (bear with me for that comparison) version of yourself? The wisest and  most caring embodiment of you?

I met my inner mentor in 2021. At the time, my instinct had signed me up to my first ever facilitation training with the author and coach Tara Mohr.* A couple of weeks into the six months programme, Mohr guided us into a visualisation (available in her book, Playing Big, more on that at the end).

All the images of this first encounter are still strangely vivid in my mind. I don’t even need to close my eyes to call onto my inner mentor. Think of her, and poof, there she appears, ready to greet me, in her Tuscan 'casale' (converted farmhouse), standing by a large, curved, velvet chartreuse-coloured sofa. We certainly have similar tastes in furniture. That first time, Mohr prompted us, asking if our inner mentor was welcoming us with refreshments of some kind. Mine was awfully specific: she motioned me to some homemade gluten-free brownies and rose petal tea, a beverage I'd never even tried before.

By the time we parted, she handed me a gift, which at the time, made no sense whatsoever: a museum-worthy necklace. Think of The Louvre's recent theft, or Elizabeth Taylor's most extravagant piece, a pile of giant diamonds and sparkling rubies. The most opulent piece of jewellery ever made? Objectively stunning. Also, not my style at all. I looked at it, as she placed the gems in my hands, thinking: what am I supposed to do with this? Hmmm… The visualisation ended, I got back to the here and now, warmed by the encounter, if mildly confused by the gift or meaning of the treats just as that of the magnificent jewels. 

A couple of days later, as I walked by my gigantic vision board (that's another story), I noticed a ruby on there, an image I'd cut out without any particular clue to what it represented. Among this visual patchwork of dream-goals, my hand reached out to touch the image. Suddenly, a meaning emerged. Oh. 

'You are as precious as the most precious jewels in the world.' Tears came to my eyes. The hidden message suddenly as clear as those diamonds.

This inner mentor visualisation was not on my to-do list. Nor had I ever done anything quite like that, especially on Zoom, in a group setting (several hundred of us attended the webinar). But I trusted our guide and gave myself to the process. Suffice to say, I found much nourishment and joy in working with my inner mentor since then.

Now’s a good time to express that I’m not particularly woo woo, as my friend Christine said to me the other day: ‘when we meet you, we can tell, you’re not « away with the fairies » (you have your feet on the ground).’

Since that first experience, I’ve used visualisation many times, for myself, and for my clients, as well in the context of mindfulness coaching. Given that I love to understand how things work, particularly human behaviour and experience, I dug into the science to better explain the process and the rationale behind using such tools.  

Neuroscience shows that mental imagery (visualisation) activates many of the same brain regions as actual sense perception. When we close our eyes to envision something, our visual cortex lights up in similar (though not identical) patterns to when you're actually seeing it. 

This extends to motor imagery too. I’m sure you’ve heard of how athletes also prepare for competition by visualising their performance ahead of time, thus activating motor areas of the brain. It seems that imagining victory helps top sportsmen and women achieve their dream goals.

On the "inner mentor" or "higher self" phenomenon specifically, this gets more speculative, but there are a few angles to explore:

There's growing therapeutic evidence that dialoguing with different "parts" of ourselves can be genuinely helpful. This is the work of Richard C. Schwartz, PhD, which you can look up here. This kind of exploration seems to engage different neural networks and can bypass some of our usual defensive thinking patterns.

When you turn attention inward and engage in what is called 'self-referential thinking' or lean into your imagination, we are activating this network associated with self-reflection, mind-wandering, and imagining other perspectives. Meeting an "inner mentor" likely engages this heavily.

Research shows that viewing problems from a third-person perspective (like asking "what would a wise version of me say?") can improve emotional regulation and decision-making. It creates useful psychological distance. Psychological distancing or cognitive diffusion are tools that are employed by many coaches, in various forms.

The "higher self" framing is more metaphysical than scientific, but the practical benefits of this tool, by accessing different perspectives, wisdom, or insights, seem to work through known psychological mechanisms like perspective-taking and accessing implicit knowledge you already have but might not consciously access otherwise.

A couple of weeks ago, my brilliant friend Libby Stockstill, who also trained with Tara Mohr, offered a guest workshop for Le Trente, over the course of which she guided our group through the inner mentor « introduction » meditation. Though I'd done this before, I let myself embrace the « visit ». True to form, my higher self was awaiting, and she welcomed me warmly into her bright and spacious living room.

When it came time to part ways, she offered me a gift. This time, she handed me over a pile of brownies on a plate. « You'll need them for the journey » she said. Huh. This left me more than puzzled, again, though grateful. I love chocolate. What journey could she be referring to though?

Last Tuesday evening (though not for the first time), it was my turn to be the guide, ushering participants into my Dream into Being in-person workshop.

Over the course of the two and a half hours, I invited them to listen to theory about goal setting, engaged them to exchange about expectations around the upcoming visualisation and goal setting (both the positive and negative), before plunging them into a deep guided body scan. We then moved into visualisation, before gently emerging for a guided journaling session.

Where's the inner mentor in all that?

Well, that afternoon, I went to a local spice shop to get rose petal tea. After much online research (I am a keen cook), I dove into what I'd identified as the most interesting gluten-free brownie recipe. After depositing the brownies into the oven, I got changed, putting on a pair of wide-legged light blue jeans and a white linen shirt, my inner mentor's uniform. Around my neck, a thick vintage gold chain with a Victorian ruby crescent moon pendant.

It was the first time I consciously stepped into my higher self's shoes, or tried to embody her to that extent. I lead the session inspired by her warmth, inviting that quality into that space, to have my participants feel the same genuine care.

Both roses and chocolate are associated with the heart - not just romantic love but heart-opening, vulnerability, connection. When we feel deeply seen, heard, cared for, it's much easier to let go of our armouring and to open up.

One of the participants messaged me a couple of days later: 

"Thanks for nurturing us and making us feel... At home!" 

Her words warmed my heart. That’s what I'd hoped to create — that same feeling of being welcomed, nourished, held. Walking in my inner mentor's shoes, I feel like I’m becoming more... myself.

It's been quite a journey to this moment. From selling those now-famous red soles to luxury fashion consulting, from mindfulness and yoga teacher training to embracing my role as a guide—each step has led me here, opening doors for others to find their way through.

And creating space for other guides to weave their magic, leading me and others to new discoveries.

Stepping into guided visualisation is closer than I'd imagined to a hero's journey. It's answering the call from deep within. Saying yes to change. Letting go and trusting — trusting life, trusting the process, trusting that the answers are already inside us.

In embracing our inner wisdom, we become ever more... ourselves.

Will you give this a try?

Psychological effects: Inner Mentor and Higher Self

Techniques such as Tara Mohr's Inner Mentor visualisation guide us to imagine meeting a future, wiser version of us, and in so doing, this exercise engages us in various meaningful ways. It can help clarify personal values, gain fresh perspectives on challenges, access intuitive wisdom, and reinforce the traits we wish to embody. This process makes accessible our inner wisdom. Those using this kind of tool (myself included) report feeling less overwhelmed, more creative, and crucially, more empowered around challenging decision-making.

From a scientific lens, it means that mentally rehearsing interactions with an inner mentor or higher self can strengthen new thinking patterns, increase cognitive flexibility, and foster neuroplasticity, essentially "rewiring" the brain for success and self-regulation

In summary, here’s what we know:

- Visualisation activates similar brain regions as real experiences, fostering neuroplasticity.
- Exercises like inner mentor visualisation enhance clarity, motivation, and access to subconscious wisdom.
- Psychological benefits include reduced stress, improved mood, and greater decisiveness.
- Repeated practice can make desired traits and insights more accessible and actionable in daily life.

Tara Mohr, mentioned above, was generously given permission to use the inner mentor tool which she had discovered through the CTI institute, who she trained with. You can find the exercise in her book, Playing Big, and more on her website, along with the recording if you'd like to experience this for yourself.

Otherwise, feel free to reach out to me for coaching involving the inner mentor modality. Don't be shy, simply answer this email.