How do we make the world better? with Libby Stockstill

[00:00:00] Anne V Mühlethaler : Hi, I am so happy to be here for another episode of the Meta interview. Today I have a very special episode for you. I am speaking to my friend Libby Stockstill, founder and CEO of Some Days, who is joining us from the enchanted town of Idlewyld California.

[00:00:22] Anne V Mühlethaler : Libby brings 20 years of legal executive and leadership experience to her work. Most recently serving as chief legal officer and corporate secretary of activewear brand Vuori where she helped. Shape the business through rapid global growth.

[00:00:40] Anne V Mühlethaler : Libby's career spans. Very successful large companies, as well as unicorn startups and includes leadership roles at Vans and Billabong, and nearly a decade practicing corporate law at Latham and Watkins. Through Some Days, [00:01:00] Libby works at the intersection of leadership and empowerment because she counsels and coaches clients in what she calls the intentional pursuit of big dreams.

[00:01:12] Anne V Mühlethaler : And equally important what gets in the way, and she's gonna tell us more about that. She's passionate about helping people navigate personal and professional challenges, overcome obstacles, and feel empowered to live fully and bravely. This conversation holds a special significance in my heart as Libby was very much the original inspiration for creating the Metta Interview.

[00:01:39] Anne V Mühlethaler : We were on a Zoom call a few months ago, and as we were discussing the masterclasses and workshops that she could offer for Le Trente, my social learning studio, I was looking at her right here on Zoom and. I thought to myself, oh gosh, I wish people could meet her just like [00:02:00] this, Libby and I, we talk a lot with our hands for some reason when we are on Zoom together, and I thought, oh, I wish everyone could see her like this.

[00:02:09] Anne V Mühlethaler : See her energy and her, I don't know, there's something sparkly and beautiful about her. And so it felt very much like I was closing a particularly, um, powerful loop by inviting her to speak on the podcast. Today, we explore her central question, the one that feels very alive for her at the moment, which is, how do we make the world better? We are gonna talk about. What it means to keep shining our light, even when the magnitude of that question threatens to overwhelm us. So without further ado, I give you my interview with Libby Stockstill.

[00:02:52] Anne V Mühlethaler : Happy listening.

[00:02:54] Anne V Mühlethaler : Libby, it's so good to see you. I'm so happy you're here.

[00:02:59] Libby Stockstill: [00:03:00] Likewise, likewise. Thank you for having me.

[00:03:03] Anne V Mühlethaler : So this is a really, it's a big circle moment because I remember when we were on a call, not on the same platform, but on Zoom, what was it, two months ago, three months ago only.

[00:03:15] Anne V Mühlethaler : And, and you were telling me about your wonderful workshops and then you were talking to me in that way that, sorry, my, my mic is gonna get in the way. 'cause you and I have a way of talking where we use our hands a lot. And I remember looking at you on my screen and thinking, gosh, people really need to meet this woman.

[00:03:35] Anne V Mühlethaler : And she's so great. I wish they could meet her, meet her, just like she is in her, in, in her natural state. In Idyllwild , the wonderful Idyllwild , nice. And then that's how the idea of the podcast begins. So perhaps I need to start with a moment of gratitude for you as my, as my muse, as my source of inspiration.

[00:03:59] Libby Stockstill: Well, [00:04:00] right back at you. I have, so I just, I love the way that this came to be so naturally and organically and, um, that's so much a part of the magic of this phase of my life. So it's just the synchronicity of it all has been really special for me. So thank you to you as well.

[00:04:17] Anne V Mühlethaler : Yay. So, I'd love for you to tell our audience, I want, I wanna say I first want them, if they are not watching, they'll have to watch the video version of this podcast.

[00:04:28] Anne V Mühlethaler : Can you introduce the wonderful environment in which you're sitting in? Because I remember the first time that I met you on Zoom. I remember looking at your surrounding thinking, this place is magical. This woman is magical. Please tell us about where you are.

[00:04:44] Libby Stockstill: Oh, thank you. Well, I am in Idyllwild , California and it is a place that I came to discover probably about 10 years ago.

[00:04:55] Libby Stockstill: It's about an hour up the mountain from Palm Springs and about two [00:05:00] hours from Orange County, San Diego and LA and it's like this unknown gem. And we, we happened upon it because we saw the sign and I just saw the name Idle W with the YLL, just loop, you know, loopy pretty like just, I mean, the sign wasn't, but in my mind I could see it and I thought, Ooh, idle wild.

[00:05:22] Libby Stockstill: What is this place? And so we had to check it out and it just kept luring us in. , I think of it as the enchanted forest. It, there's just a special energy here. And it is this beautiful combination of nature, but also not, you know, obligatory things that you're supposed to do in nature. There's not skiing, there's not a lake, there's just the trees and the rocks and the, all of the forest creatures and, you know, in all of their glory.

[00:05:54] Libby Stockstill: So it's a very, for me, it's been really kind of a creative muse. I'm [00:06:00] incorporating this place into some of the work that I do because of the special energy here.

[00:06:05] Libby Stockstill: And I love getting to introduce people or reacquaint people with. Just the quiet and the calm. And I think it's such a metaphor for life, right? It's just down the street for so many people, in the southern California area, obviously not just down the street for you. But it's so close to so many people.

[00:06:23] Libby Stockstill: And yet just like, you know, with the work that you do with loving kindness and, you know, it's like, it's right there, but we can miss that. We can feel like it's a hundred thousand miles away when really sometimes what we're really seeking is closer than we think. And it's really just about being intentional.

[00:06:44] Anne V Mühlethaler : Yeah. That resonates a lot. I wish it was down the street from me.

[00:06:49] Libby Stockstill: I know. Me too. I'm gonna get you here one day and I'll come back over there as well.

[00:06:53] Anne V Mühlethaler : Of course. Now, one of the ways I have decided to start these, Metta [00:07:00] interviews is by asking my guests. Instead of without of the clouds.

[00:07:04] Anne V Mühlethaler : I ask you to tell your story here. I'd like you to tell me about what's bringing joy or excitement to you these days? And it could be anything casual, mundane, or profound. What's bringing you joy and excitement?

[00:07:21] Libby Stockstill: Well, I, so a few things. Lots of things. One, I just finished a week long fiction writing Intensive at Idyllwild Arts, which is a lovely art school up here.

[00:07:35] Libby Stockstill: And they brought in Alex Espinoza, who's a fabulous author, so gifted and he led this small cohort for the week and it was just very, very powerful and very inspiring. And it's really, it's really, re-grounded me in the power of story. And I mean something you know, quite well and yeah, just I, [00:08:00] it's helped me get really focused and excited for the second half of the year.

[00:08:03] Libby Stockstill: And, similarly, I'm very much in this strategic daydreaming of the retreat I'm holding up here in Idyllwild in the fall. So I've been sort of, I ideating for, you know, it was, it's been a dream for a long time and then I've been slowly kind of building it through the year and I'm finally to the place where I get to tinker and add all the bells and whistles that I've been dreaming about.

[00:08:25] Libby Stockstill: So that's really, really fun. I'm meeting with someone this afternoon who's gonna help with sound, one of my favorite sound healers. And anyway, I'm very excited about all of this.

[00:08:36] Anne V Mühlethaler : That's really cool. And, uh, yes, I remember you telling me about Alex ESP Espinoza, and I'm really looking forward to discovering his work.

[00:08:43] Anne V Mühlethaler : That sounds really special.

[00:08:45] Libby Stockstill: Very special. Yes.

[00:08:46] Anne V Mühlethaler : Now, something that's a little bit more difficult to do is, but it, it's very important is would you kindly introduce yourself to our audience? In a few words,

[00:08:58] Anne V Mühlethaler : yes. I will [00:09:00] do my best. I knew you were going to ask me to do this, and it's, it is my, it is a very, it was very uncomfortable place right now because this used to be so easy when I was in my lawyer, corporate executive, you know, era.

[00:09:20] Anne V Mühlethaler : And I would be able to say my title and my company, and even if it felt in incomplete, it kind of ticked a certain box and then I could choose to share the rest if it felt safe, if it felt like that was the place. But I was able to kind of tinker with it, but I knew I could just check the box pretty easy.

[00:09:38] Anne V Mühlethaler : And changing my life in the ways that I have. To really focus on those other things that were optional to disclose full time. It's really changed things and it's kind of caused this reckoning of like, how do I introduce myself? Who am I? And it's, it takes a few more words. So [00:10:00] if you'll bear with me.

[00:10:01] Anne V Mühlethaler : Yes, please. Yes. So today I sit here as the founder and CEO of some days, which is the umbrella under which I write and I speak and I coach and consult in service of the intentional pursuit of big dreams. And then the equally important what gets in the way. I feel like I spend a lot of time personally and with others on the what gets in the way. And I'm just, I'm very passionate about this. And with that, embracing the imper perfectionism, that's kind of required, the letting go of. Having all the i's dotted, meeting with glowing glowing applause the first time you try something. And just embracing the, the beautiful chaos and messiness of life.

[00:10:48] Anne V Mühlethaler : And I explore those themes in some other writings and art as well. And I'm a, you know, a wife, a mother, sister, daughter, friend, warrior. All all the things.

[00:11:00] Anne V Mühlethaler : All the things. Yeah. I so appreciate you naming your discomfort around this. 'cause I, it's been a big theme for me in the last eight years since leaving my corporate job and finding it very difficult to name my identity the, the way that is normally done in the west.

[00:11:20] Anne V Mühlethaler : At least I can't speak for everywhere in the world. Yeah. We are so deeply wrapped up. Our identities are so wrapped up in where we work. Yeah. What we do at work. Mm-hmm. That sometimes when you don't know how to explain that to people, you feel just simply inadequate. Yeah. When it, when it shouldn't be.

[00:11:41] Anne V Mühlethaler : Right. Yeah. Yeah. Now with all of that, I'd like to make sure that the beginning of this podcast offers people a chance to get to know you beyond the work persona, which mm-hmm. I think is really important also, because I feel like we are so much more than what we do, and I have [00:12:00] this new question that I really love teasing out.

[00:12:03] Anne V Mühlethaler : And this is, here it goes. Is there a childhood memory that still makes you smile?

[00:12:10] Libby Stockstill: Oh, yeah. You know, this, this actually came up for me the other day. I was talking to someone that I knew in, in my, you know, my last era and in a different way in this era, and they said were you always. Were you always creative?

[00:12:28] Libby Stockstill: Where did this kind of come from? And I thought back to a memory I think of often when I was little and I used to sit, I'd go outside and I'd stand next to the flowers and I would sing them somewhere over the rainbow and pretend I was Dorothy. And, um, I just, and I, I felt like I was connecting with them, which is really interesting because that's not something, that's not a concept that was introduced to me.

[00:12:52] Libby Stockstill: I mean, I see, you know, we're, we're talking to the trees and Idyllwild and doing all of those things, but we weren't doing that in Kingwood, Texas when I [00:13:00] was six. So, so that, that one stands out to me. And then I always think of walking to swim team through the green belt. I had kinda neighborhood swim team and I'd, I would make up stories and act them out with myself as I walked.

[00:13:14] Libby Stockstill: Like, that's just kind of what I did, as in my, in my spacious time between my house and the pool.

[00:13:22] Anne V Mühlethaler : Hold on a second. How did that work?

[00:13:25] Libby Stockstill: Oh, you just, I would just talk to myself. I mean, I still do this. You were

[00:13:29] Anne V Mühlethaler : making up stories and just like, oh, yeah. I was just, instantly, I was thinking, are you, were you making up different characters?

[00:13:36] Anne V Mühlethaler : Yeah. Or single voice. Oh, wow. That's

[00:13:37] Libby Stockstill: so cool.

[00:13:38] Anne V Mühlethaler : Yeah.

[00:13:39] Libby Stockstill: Yeah. I, yeah. And, and I mean, I, I, it must have been interesting to see me walking to, to the pool. But yeah, I mean, I just, I always had, I loved letting myself get lost and thought or in the daydream and just kind of letting those journeys take me on a creative [00:14:00] adventure.

[00:14:00] Anne V Mühlethaler : Mm. And then I'd go to swim

[00:14:02] Libby Stockstill: team.

[00:14:03] Anne V Mühlethaler : Yeah, of course. And then he'd be at swim team. Do you know, I feel like my younger self really sees your younger self. I mean, I think that one of the most difficult moments in my brother's life. Was when we were on the bus to school because I, I was just singing all the time, singing everywhere all the time.

[00:14:20] Anne V Mühlethaler : And it's really funny because for years, and I still occasionally do it, I really wanna sing, but I'm outside and there are people, so I'd be like listening to a tune. And then when people are just walking away, I'd be singing it louder and then, oh, oops, someone's coming across. I'm just singing it to myself.

[00:14:36] Anne V Mühlethaler : So just, you know, I'm just amplifying and, and lowering the volume and I'm looking like a real, yeah, so much

[00:14:44] Libby Stockstill: joy

[00:14:45] Anne V Mühlethaler : to

[00:14:45] Libby Stockstill: me. But what if, what if everyone was singing in the street? What if you walked down the sidewalk and people were singing, or they were, you know, acting out the, the stories in their mind? I mean, what kind of a world would that be?[00:15:00]

[00:15:00] Anne V Mühlethaler : Not that one, that's for sure.

[00:15:03] Libby Stockstill: Yes, yes. It just makes me think of that little light inside of us.

[00:15:12] Libby Stockstill: Mm-hmm. When not even necessarily when we're young, but, but that essence of the thing that made you wanna sing. Right. What is that, what is that spark that made you wanna sing? And then what is it that makes us say, oh no, not here.

[00:15:29] Anne V Mühlethaler : Yeah, it's a good question. I have to park this because at the moment I don't sing as much, so it's almost like I need to think about also the spark sometime gets redirected.

[00:15:44] Anne V Mühlethaler : Yeah, yeah, yeah. Maybe the Spark is the podcast. It's almost like it's finding another way for me to, I don't know. I feel like, I feel like my, the singer part of me may. Want to pick a [00:16:00] fight if I don't, like, if I don't plant this seed and think about it and come back to you about that.

[00:16:05] Libby Stockstill: Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay.

[00:16:08] Libby Stockstill: Alright. Part

[00:16:09] Anne V Mühlethaler : Yeah, yeah, absolutely. Now as you remember, part of what I wanted to do with the meta interview is not just create like a really warm space for us to have a great conversation and to help introduce you to an audience that doesn't know you and and, and get to show the multifaceted part of who you are.

[00:16:31] Anne V Mühlethaler : 'cause I guess that we got to know each other and we went deep pretty fast because we were coaching each other. Mm-hmm. And, and so I wanted to ask you, and I know it's maybe a tricky question, but what is an early experience you can think of that perhaps planted the seed for the work that you do now? Oh

[00:16:57] Libby Stockstill: yeah.

[00:16:59] Libby Stockstill: Yeah. [00:17:00] And I don't know that it's like one experience, one moment, but I think, I think it, it stems from that same girl, right? The, the girl that was in her head and in her dreams and, that girl kind of grew into someone with a lot of creative dreams in a world that kind of said those dreams were unrealistic or, you know, impractical or unreasonable or unlikely.

[00:17:32] Libby Stockstill: And what's been interesting to me throughout my career and my life journey is that,

[00:17:41] Libby Stockstill: as I took what I think society may have told me was a more practical or a safer path. I still followed the, you know, the energy of what was pulling me. And I found myself in rooms with all the people doing the things [00:18:00] that I had kind of longed to do as a young girl.

[00:18:03] Libby Stockstill: And in that I learned that people are actually doing the things, I saw the possibility, right? Like, no, no, that was real. People do those things. People are making those things happen. So that was one, , that contrast was a big revelation. And I also saw myself kind of defy the odds to be in those rooms too, even if I was adding value in a different way.

[00:18:31] Libby Stockstill: And none of those paths were, easy or guaranteed. But the point was like, they existed and I saw it right before my eyes and. It's like I had the proof and I think the rebel in me and the kind of older me that has paid my dues, if you will, or whatever, gone on the journey to get to this place with the experience and maybe a little [00:19:00] more confidence than she had.

[00:19:02] Libby Stockstill: Mm-hmm. I, I just now, I wanna fight for that possibility and, and fight for people's dreams and, and, and shine the light on, you know, believe in it, you know, give it a chance. And not that, not that you have to do the dream, but that the dream, that energy tells you something when you light up, that energy's telling you something.

[00:19:26] Libby Stockstill: And I really think that when we just allow ourselves to even look in that direction and even start inching towards whatever that is, I think there's really. There's something special that can happen. And this is kind of maybe my life's work. Mm-hmm. And, and certainly through some days and probably otherwise.

[00:19:48] Libby Stockstill: So I don't know. I don't have all the answers, but I think that essence of that dreamy girl, you know, the world of being practical and then the world of [00:20:00] possibility, all of those things are kind of in the soup together, exploring and saying, Hmm, what's possible if all of those dreams were maybe not so impractical?

[00:20:12] Libby Stockstill: What might be possible for us both personally, but more broadly as a world?

[00:20:19] Anne V Mühlethaler : Yeah. I actually love how you're framing this, and this is making me want to ask you the question, when did you become aware of the possibilities that open when we ask a great question. Hmm. I'm asking because I came to this really late.

[00:20:44] Anne V Mühlethaler : If I'd been a teenager with a greater que with a better question, who knows what would've happened? Oh, my. And I don't regret my path of, obviously, yeah. But, but there is great powering great questions.

[00:20:57] Libby Stockstill: There really is. Well, and I, you know, [00:21:00] as you say that, for much of my life, I'm not sure I allowed myself questions, and I see that I've got this figured out armor mask that, I've got the, I've got, I'm gonna figure this out.

[00:21:15] Libby Stockstill: I'm gonna do this. I don't know that questions started, even I'm thinking in law school, hmm. It was, it was very scary to ask the question of the thing that I didn't know, because it seemed like everybody else always knew. Hmm. So I don't know if it was as late as working with Tara and training and, you know, maybe, maybe my entry into receiving coaching and then training as a coach might have been, I mean, a huge part of it.

[00:21:46] Libby Stockstill: Realizing, oh my gosh, it's not about me having the answer, it is actually sitting with the question or, or asking the question of someone [00:22:00] else, or I noticed this in my legal life too. I, I came in many cases from such a different background like a, and sometimes it felt like I was speaking a different language and at first there was this trying to.

[00:22:15] Libby Stockstill: To fit in and not stand out because nobody wants the lawyer in the room. You know? So like, how do I keep my seat at the table and I don't wanna, I, I don't wanna disclose that I, you know, thinking about this differently. But then you realize, wow, there's great power in asking a question from especially if, if you're so in it.

[00:22:35] Libby Stockstill: If somebody can come from a different perspective and, and shine a light and ask a question that maybe nobody's asked before, or maybe they only asked early in the process, and asking it again now is, is a whole different vantage point. It can really be powerful.

[00:22:52] Anne V Mühlethaler : Hmm. Yeah. As I was hearing you giving me your [00:23:00] answer, I was asking myself the question too, was it with Tara?

[00:23:06] Anne V Mühlethaler : And it kind of was, but it wasn't because when I was doing my yoga teacher training. I had this epiphany we, our teacher gave us like a real super intense physical two hour session and then a very, like a super long, maybe 20 minutes. Mm-hmm. At the end of it, she had us set eyes closed before journaling, and she asked us to noodle with the question, what obstacle can I remove?

[00:23:33] Anne V Mühlethaler : What is an obstacle that I can remove? And I just, this changed my life. I was like, oh my God. There are so many ways in which I am putting obstacles in my own way. And sometimes it's the smallest things that we decide that we don't want to do on any given day that are going to be creating ripple, negative ripple effects, right, in our lives.

[00:23:55] Anne V Mühlethaler : And so I regularly have this post-it on my desk, [00:24:00] what obstacle can I remove? And then later on I discovered, uh, Tara, and she's the person who got me into coach. Hmm.

[00:24:08] Libby Stockstill: Yeah, likewise. Yeah. But I, I think, yeah, I think there's so much power in it, and that's, I mean, again, that something so simple that's so accessible.

[00:24:19] Anne V Mühlethaler : Yeah.

[00:24:20] Libby Stockstill: I, it was pretty late in life before I end upon it.

[00:24:25] Anne V Mühlethaler : Yeah. I ha I wonder if it, I wonder if it's also the reason why you and I also are really enthusiastic about the work that we do, because now I've found the power of great questions. I'm like, hold on guys, who wants to work with me? I can do magic, magic, magic.

[00:24:45] Anne V Mühlethaler : And it's true that even beyond questions, I think that because I've studied mindfulness and, and, and loving kindness and Buddhist practices and love listening to a dharma talk, I, I find myself very at home in what [00:25:00] is generally called the contemplative practices. So it's. Like you said, it's sitting with the question, it's not just the act of asking and looking for an immediate answer.

[00:25:09] Anne V Mühlethaler : Yeah. But yeah, I think that this is something that sort of a, that has pulled us toward each other.

[00:25:16] Libby Stockstill: Definitely, and, and I think also, and I know we've talked about this before, that, you know, not every place and not every container that we find ourselves in is a safe place to open ourselves to those questions and to sit with 'em or to, to share what's coming up.

[00:25:36] Libby Stockstill: And so that reality and then like making those, those safe places to be able to do it and to normalize that feels so important. You know? 'cause I have had people say to me, well, gosh, if I ask that question, who knows? And it's, and so the power of making [00:26:00] that accessible. Not such a, such a scary thing or such a yeah, just making it, making it accessible.

[00:26:08] Anne V Mühlethaler : Yeah. You said not such a scary thing. And I want to say, before I discovered Tara and before that I had a book, there was a lot of questions in it, and I bought the book in London. I moved to New York, and it's not until I was miserable in Paris that I actually used the chapter with all the questions.

[00:26:29] Anne V Mühlethaler : So sometimes also there are times when we don't feel safe enough to, to, to, what's the word I'm looking for? Grapple with the questions.

[00:26:42] Libby Stockstill: Yeah. Well, 'cause sometimes if we really open ourselves to the answers, sometimes that means that things. Need to change and, and, or maybe, there's a lot of ways in which the answers to the questions can be scary or hard or [00:27:00] something that we need to I, I find in my own life, sometimes I circle the answer and there's a knowing somewhere, but there's a, there's an opening of the door and seeing, seeing a little bit more, you know, getting comfortable with a little

[00:27:13] Anne V Mühlethaler : bit more, and then

[00:27:14] Libby Stockstill: you're,

[00:27:15] Anne V Mühlethaler : yeah.

[00:27:17] Anne V Mühlethaler : That's such a great analogy. See, using your hands. I love it.

[00:27:22] Anne V Mühlethaler : Now, if you could describe your professional journey as a type of journey, it could be a road trip, a climb, a dance, what would you describe it as?

[00:27:34] Libby Stockstill: Oh gosh.

[00:27:38] Libby Stockstill: I feel like maybe it would be. I don't think I've gone on one of these trips. I'm probably gonna describe it wrong. So that's gonna be my little caveat. But I'm imagining like this super organized trip where you're going to the really fantastic place that's far away that you've never been and you're gonna, you know, da da da da da da da.

[00:27:56] Libby Stockstill: And then you get there and something kind of pulls your [00:28:00] curiosity and you meander away from the group and you let your kind of, you know, the synchronicity and the spark and the intuition guide you and somehow you're on this more epic adventure through the cobblestone streets. And that, that's I think what it feels like at this moment.

[00:28:19] Anne V Mühlethaler : That's wonderful. It's funny 'cause you de describing that and somehow I was finding myself in a strange place in my mind. I was like, oh, I'm on a trip. Ooh, there's a cobblestone. Yes. Let's go. Read me. Great. We'll mean. Now, how did you become involved with coaching and how did you discover Tara's work?

[00:28:41] Libby Stockstill: So, it's funny, it, it came through writing, and if you'll bear, I'm a, I'm, I'm a non-linear thinker and maybe as a result, my life has been a bit non-linear as well.

[00:28:53] Libby Stockstill: So bear with me, you know,

[00:28:54] Anne V Mühlethaler : you're in a safe place because I'm very non-linear too, so

[00:28:57] Libby Stockstill: I love it. That's probably why we, yeah, yeah. We [00:29:00] meander together. Absolutely. Yeah. But, but I, it, it came through writing, and writing came through. I was an English major and, and literature classes were so transformative for me. They were the place that I could see the beauty and the messiness and the, like, the grappling with all of the human emotions and just the drama, but the, the, the hope, but also the pain. I mean, just all of it. It was, it was, it was almost like a lifeline. It was the first time that I really felt like I could, I was seen in the darkness and the complexity and the questioning that I never really could let show. And, and so that was always something that I wanted to do, but I, I didn't, and, and I, I found myself saying, you know, someday I wanna [00:30:00] write the next Great American novel. And I would talk about this. I mean, this daydream was, you know, anytime we'd have a slightly longer conversation, this would come around and.

[00:30:12] Libby Stockstill: When people, a couple times people would ask me what I was working on, and I would have this very embarrassing moment of like, oh gosh, I don't actually write. And, and, but then I told myself, you know, you've got this big job and you've got a family and dah, dah, dah, dah, dah. You couldn't, possibly, you could've, possibly.

[00:30:29] Libby Stockstill: And then I got to a company that was all about creativity. And I saw all of these other people who had, you know, the job, the, the family, the extra, you know, the other things, all the things that I was using to tell myself that I couldn't possibly, they were doing the art at lunch. People were bringing these other passions that they had and weaving them into their life somehow.

[00:30:52] Libby Stockstill: And I realized, oh no. Oh no, I don't know either. If this is just an [00:31:00] idea that I love and I don't wanna let go of, or is this something that I really wanna do? And if it is something that I wanna do. I need to at least own a personal computer, which I didn't at the time, which

[00:31:12] Anne V Mühlethaler : you told me the other day.

[00:31:13] Anne V Mühlethaler : And that freaked me out massively.

[00:31:15] Libby Stockstill: I know I didn't, I mean, I didn't have anything outside of work. I mean, I didn't even have like the personal documents, which is wild. Wow. So that was this moment that, that I was like, I'm gonna take that first step. I'm getting my personal computer and on it I will write things.

[00:31:35] Libby Stockstill: And that step, I became a writer with that and every step forward. And then Tara offered a virtual writing retreat at the end of 2020. And I'm always feeling like at the calendar year end, I'm not big on, New Year's resolutions or big parties for New Year's, but I always want it to feel [00:32:00] important and I.

[00:32:01] Libby Stockstill: Often struggle with how to do that. And I thought this after this year, this is perfect. And I think I might have stumbled into her Sunday sessions where she was doing coaching perhaps before that. But some, those two things lined up and I formed a group after that, or I was part of a group that was formed after that.

[00:32:23] Libby Stockstill: And we stayed in touch. We were in the writing and the seeking in the entrepreneurship. And at one point of my new friends said, have you thought about coaching? And I really didn't know, other than Tara's work very much about it. But it intrigued me because I really do care about the big dream, right?

[00:32:44] Libby Stockstill: And at the time with my team, how do I help people grow and help people find their path to their big dream? So I just started following the thread and it, it both shaped some of my writing and the musings that were coming [00:33:00] to me and I felt called to share. And it also blossomed into something that I really enjoyed doing and ultimately have decided to, you know, give a lot more of my focus to

[00:33:16] Anne V Mühlethaler : I a wonderful story.

[00:33:18] Anne V Mühlethaler : Hmm. That Tara Mohr. She, she does good work. Does she really does. Now, I was wondering between the skills that I understand that you have developed as, as a, as a lawyer, as a legal professional and what, you know, from coaching and writing and, and your artistic pursuits, what's a skill that you have that people would be surprised about?

[00:33:49] Libby Stockstill: Gosh, a skill that I have,

[00:33:57] Libby Stockstill: I don't know if it's a skill.

[00:33:59] Libby Stockstill: [00:34:00] I have been told, so I, I'm, I, I'm an empath and I'm very sensitive, which is not, you know, I feel like those are, those people ask you in the interview like, what's one of your flaws? And you're like, oh, I'm, I'm too much of an empath. And I don't mean it like that, but I, but I. Sometimes it can be very challenging, especially in the world that we live in.

[00:34:26] Libby Stockstill: So not that that's a skill, but I, I think, I think it's a part of what I hear from people, that I have a way of making it safe to be vulnerable. And I feel like that's not always associated with, there are great lawyers for whom that is often true, but not everybody's experience in the legal realm is that.

[00:34:50] Libby Stockstill: So I, I think that is one where people might be like, oh, that's interesting. A safe space for a very armored, typically very [00:35:00] armored group to feel like they, can maybe leave that at the door and, , yes. You know, be that, be their full, authentic self and ask those hard. I mean, maybe it circles back to that same.

[00:35:13] Libby Stockstill: Safe space to ask hard questions or just to be imperfect. Yeah. You know, and, And maybe some of my own, it's very hard to be, and, you know, to be the person that's supposed to have all the answers in plan A, plan B, plan C, and to have thought of everything to try to embrace imper perfectionism in that, in that container is, is not always easy.

[00:35:36] Libby Stockstill: So being able to hold both of those things and, and, and create a space for people yeah, I don't, I don't know if that totally is a skill, but it.

[00:35:49] Anne V Mühlethaler : It. It's a, it's a mixture. I would say, , as I hear it, it's, um, it's a blend. It's a trait and a skill, right? Yeah. Because if you, [00:36:00] you now know that it's something that you can wield, that you can bring that actually does something special in the world. Hmm

[00:36:10] Libby Stockstill: mm-hmm. And I think with, with the non centering of a coaching approach too, you know, it's not that I'm the, the empath that you want, I'm almost not, I think there's the, the power of not being center in that container too, and, and being a bit pulled back so that there is more space.

[00:36:35] Anne V Mühlethaler : Yeah. I see what you mean. Now, I'd love for us to now move to explore what is the question that feels alive for you right now, and if you haven't heard the first episode or if you've not heard the trailer. I wanna just preface by saying I. After my conversation with Libby and the conversation [00:37:00] with my other friend Anna, I came to this conclusion that on the one hand side, I really wanted us to be ourselves and meet on camera and just to have, a really sort of heartfelt, multifaceted conversation.

[00:37:15] Anne V Mühlethaler : where I would tease out the brilliance of all my friends. Hopefully I've done an, a good job of that so far. But I also thought that instead of positioning ourselves as experts, it would be really fresher if we talked about what's a question? Well, the theme is continuing. What is a question we're grappling with?

[00:37:36] Anne V Mühlethaler : What's an important question that we are trying to answer for ourselves and our lives? And it could be at any level. And so, Libby, I'd love to to hear from you. What's the question that feels alive for you at the moment? Yeah.

[00:37:51] Libby Stockstill: And I think that this, I think this is the question, you know, when I think about, I was, I was sitting with just my life [00:38:00] getting ready for this and, and not knowing exactly where the conversation would lead and, and thinking about when I started practicing law and all the things that, that, that drove those decisions too.

[00:38:13] Libby Stockstill: And there's, there's this common kind of question and discomfort in me around like, how do we make the world better? You know? And I, I feel like that in some ways maybe that's, I almost feel like, you know, I'm thinking of mis congeniality and like the world peace, you know? But, but so I like, I get that, I get that.

[00:38:34] Libby Stockstill: Maybe that's trite, but really it, it eats me up and, and it always kind of has. And so just coming around and around to how do we make the world better? And feeling like that is so big.

[00:38:57] Anne V Mühlethaler : Mm-hmm.

[00:38:58] Libby Stockstill:  [00:39:00] Yeah, that it's so big. And then getting stuck in the bigness, which is kind of what the intentional pursuit of big dreams is all about.

[00:39:09] Libby Stockstill: Because the big dream you get for me, I get stuck in the bigness, right? You, you think, oh, I wanna do this. That's really hard. How could I possibly, I guess I just, I guess, I guess I just will keep doing what I'm doing. Right?  So how do you, how do you come to something actionable? How do you, how do you make the world better with a question that big?

[00:39:35] Libby Stockstill: And, and the world that we're living in,

[00:39:37] Anne V Mühlethaler : you know, I want to answer with my hands, but having a microphone is actually hindering my game, my hand gesture game. I did not think this through. Uh, that's such a, that's such a big question and it's such an important one. You know, I can tell you for a fact that I woke up in January, I can't remember if it was January 3rd, [00:40:00] I think it was.

[00:40:00] Anne V Mühlethaler : I think that was a Monday. And I woke up sort of almost at a bolt up in, in bed that morning and I just thought, that's it. We need to make the world better. It just can't keep on going like that. And that's what my, one of my focus this year has been to really just spread more and more of the teaching of loving kindness so that the more people practice Metta this sort of sense of goodwill and benevolence to themselves and to others.

[00:40:33] Anne V Mühlethaler : I truly think that if everyone was to do that, or even half the world actually would be in a better place. But let's go back to the bigness. Yeah. How, how in your work or in your day-to-day do you live with the question for starters,

[00:40:59] Libby Stockstill: I [00:41:00] mean, I'll tell, I'll tell you how it tends to go. It tends to go almost like a, I don't know if it's a virtuous or a vicious cycle where, you know, I'll be doing all the things and then I, I get frozen in a bigness of, this is so big and this is so much bigger, and who am I and how could I possibly?

[00:41:25] Libby Stockstill: You know, this is, and, and it, it is easy to feel. Sorry, I just got a little weep of emotion. It's easy to feel hopeless. Yeah. When you look, you know, I mean, big and small, there's so much hard in our world, and some days you are looking at one after another after another, and it, it feels so big. And, and sometimes I say, what?

[00:41:58] Libby Stockstill: Like, [00:42:00] what am why am I, why do I even ask? I mean like, how do, what am I even gonna do? Who am I? And it can get to, it can actually be, like, it can be a pretty dark place. And the way that I kind of climb myself out of that hole is always, I just keep coming back to, well, of course we have to shine our light, you know?

[00:42:21] Libby Stockstill: If I can just keep figuring out how to keep showing up and shining my light. And, and if, if, if that can inspire other people to do that too, similar to what you were saying with loving kindness. I mean, that is one of your lights to shine and you doing that if everybody brings their light and is shining it, I, it just, it feels like it has to be, it has to be that. Because we can't all take on the huge thing, but we all have these special lights within us and the world that we're in the hopeless, you know, all of the things can [00:43:00] really dim them.

[00:43:01] Libby Stockstill: So it, it is almost this kind of revolutionary act to, to just try to just keep showing up and keep trying to shine and inspire others to shine. Anyway, so that, that is, that is the loop and that is how I live with this question regularly, but then I see it and we'll have a conversation and I see what you're doing.

[00:43:23] Libby Stockstill: And I say, aha, it is shining the light. There is something to this. And yes, and those are the days where I really feel the momentum and, and that I use for the hope on the days where the bigness sometimes feels like it's gonna win.

[00:43:42] Anne V Mühlethaler : Yeah. I first wanted to say, it's interesting because what I first heard in your answer is the cyclical nature almost of the doing, I can do this, I can do this, I can do this.

[00:43:57] Anne V Mühlethaler : Oh no, I can't do this, I can't do this, I can't do this. [00:44:00] Right. , , It's making me think of the earth rotation for some reason. Right. Say, there's, there's the dark and there's a light. There's a light, and we kind of need to go through the full circle.

[00:44:10] Anne V Mühlethaler : It's true that in, in the last few days, oh, I don't spend much time on Instagram. But I have felt more compelled because there was so much stuff going on that I just sometimes need to see, not just the headline, but the memes. Yeah. But I, I, I think I've started following too many, nature conservancy foundations, various branches of the un.

[00:44:39] Anne V Mühlethaler : And so it's, I feel like I'm being pummeled from, from various sides every time that I open my computer and it feels very incap, capacitating. I don't know for you, but I try to remember myself on days when I feel like I've, all, my energy's been sucked [00:45:00] out, that I just need to, in any way, I can just sort of crawl back into myself, refresh, fill myself up with energy, hope, whatever you name it.

[00:45:15] Anne V Mühlethaler : Yeah. And then sort of come back out and be like, okay, let's do this again. Yeah. I don't remember this being that hard. I don't remember the world feeling as tense and negative and violent and scary in my life before. And I wanna say I've got a good memory more, most, I know it's very fallible.

[00:45:40] Anne V Mühlethaler : I understand the concept of memory. Yeah. But I have a good memory and I, I, and then it doesn't feel like it's ever been that hard ever. Yeah.

[00:45:51] Libby Stockstill: Hmm. Yeah. Well, I think that for me, it's also coupled with a chapter in my life [00:46:00] where I am really trying to meet my life in the world with an, awakeness and an awareness and where I can, I'm saying this and I'm imagining, getting sucked into my phone, but like, where I can, not letting distraction just take me out or all of, Brene Brown, all of the many ways that we can numb, you know, and if, if you're, if you're removing those kind of veils and blurs and you pair that with the time that we're in, that is a very that's a

[00:46:35] Libby Stockstill: we're gonna feel it. I think we almost have to feel it to be able to change it and, well, not almost. I think we have, we have to.

[00:46:44] Anne V Mühlethaler : Yeah. And

[00:46:44] Libby Stockstill: I think there is the, the dance kind of like you're talking about, of like, we also have to know how to, to, to heal and, and bolster ourselves. Yeah. So that we don't just throw our arms up in the [00:47:00] hopelessness and give up, because I feel like that, that feels too close to, and if we all got to that place, we really would never make any progress.

[00:47:14] Libby Stockstill: Right? Mm-hmm. So I, I think there's this like fierce,

[00:47:19] Libby Stockstill: coming back and finding a way to find the hope and like finding a way to do the work, do the things that we need to do to nourish ourselves so that we are our strongest, we are at our , the highest levels of capacity that we can in any given moment.

[00:47:37] Libby Stockstill: And sometimes that's not gonna be full capacity. 'cause it's hard.

[00:47:41] Anne V Mühlethaler : Yeah, absolutely. Hmm. I was wondering, I was wondering, what do you do to nurture in yourself this sensation of awareness of awakeness, of, of shining your light?[00:48:00]

[00:48:02] Libby Stockstill: Oh, I mean at, I guess there's multiple levels to that. As like the most basic level. I do morning pages every morning and, and that sort

[00:48:15] Anne V Mühlethaler : of helps lot. You do this thing.

[00:48:17] Libby Stockstill: Yeah, absolutely. But I mean, for years I didn't journal 'cause I didn't wanna, I didn't want, you know, my thoughts recorded somewhere, it was scary to think about that.

[00:48:27] Libby Stockstill: And, I also had so many funny journals that I would start journaling and it would be like performative journaling. So if somebody found it, it would be a, yeah. , So, and I was a teenager. That's certainly what,

[00:48:37] Anne V Mühlethaler : what was going on? Yeah,

[00:48:38] Libby Stockstill: yeah,

[00:48:39] Anne V Mühlethaler : yeah. Finish one.

[00:48:40] Libby Stockstill: Yeah. But now that is how I try to stay awake and aware with myself of like, what is up for me right now and just kind of getting it out onto the page so I can see it and respond to it.

[00:48:53] Libby Stockstill: I try to listen you, you know, as I'm talking, talking, talking. , I try to listen, I try to put myself [00:49:00] in situations where. I'm gonna be exposed to different voices. I'm gonna be exposed to different perspectives and trying to, trying to hold an openness as I do to, again, if I believe that we all have a special light to shine, then I need to listen.

[00:49:22] Libby Stockstill: I need to look, I need to see the lights. If I believe that the answer is in us all shining our light, then you know, I have a lot of listening to do. So that's another. And then I really connecting with nature and there's a, the healer that I'm speaking with later, who I am incorporating into my retreat, she does really incredible, like tea and sound for the full moon and the new Moon.

[00:49:52] Libby Stockstill: And so there's something about connecting with the cycles of nature and the kind of calling in and [00:50:00] the letting go in a, in a cyclical, regular, intentional practice that has, that has for the self-care piece. That has been really, really helpful for me, holding intention throughout this exploration.

[00:50:17] Anne V Mühlethaler : Oh, that's so fascinating you say that because I've been finding myself more and more drawn towards rituals. And actually I have an interview for Out of the Clouds tomorrow with an artist and designer who's done a project to marry the unlikely cultures of African traditions and Japanese traditions.

[00:50:43] Anne V Mühlethaler : And where he found common ground was the ritual nature, the animist, the animist nature. Of their, of their societies. Oh, that sounds beautiful. That I'm now going to seek someone who does what you describe in Geneva. [00:51:00] One of the things that I wanted to note, you talk about listening and what you're doing, but I reckon that, and maybe I'm wrong, but I reckon you charge up as well when you support others, when you lead them as a coach or as a facilitator, right?

[00:51:20] Anne V Mühlethaler : Yeah, yeah. No, it's true. You don't shine their, like back on them. Yeah.

[00:51:27] Libby Stockstill: Yeah. That is the hope, but I, and I, I do, I think you're right. It lights me up too because I see, when, when you see someone have the epiphany of or the shift and the. All of a sudden everything is tracking and you're, that it, like you said, it feels like magic.

[00:51:50] Libby Stockstill: And, there's an aspect of it that, that fuels my hopeless, my, not my hopelessness, but fuels my hope. It fuels my hope. It dispels the hopelessness. 'cause I see [00:52:00] it in a, in a minute you can see the change. And then the flip side of that and one of the things that I love about the work that I do is I have to walk the walk.

[00:52:11] Libby Stockstill: And, and it's true as a mom too. And both of both the coaching and raising my son have really been the best accountability partners anyone could ask for. Because I can't do the things that I need to do if I'm not, if I'm not walking the walk. So if I'm feeling like the big, the bigness of everything is winning.

[00:52:35] Libby Stockstill: Mm-hmm. I have to ask the right questions. I have to do the right things to get myself back.

[00:52:41] Anne V Mühlethaler : Yeah, that's really beautiful. I love how there's that relationship between the coaching and the being a mother. I find that the holding space in a guided meditation and the holding space for you in an interview or in a coaching session, [00:53:00] all of these things have sort of nourished me as to making more room for emergence.

[00:53:11] Anne V Mühlethaler : I think that I've noticed that perhaps we talk a lot about how polarized the world is, and I just wanna say Switzerland is just as polarized as everywhere else in the world, and, and part of what I realized is we often just cut ourselves off from possibility by refusing to let each other go to the end of our thoughts.

[00:53:33] Anne V Mühlethaler : So the deep listening that you are mentioning, the making space for someone to just express themselves is perhaps the practice that we're missing the most. What do you think?

[00:53:47] Libby Stockstill: I, yes, I know how sensitive even this idea is because of the, how polarizing everything is and how challenging everything is.

[00:53:57] Libby Stockstill: I heard Michelle Obama speak earlier this year, and she was [00:54:00] talking about this too, where focusing on what, what we have in common we've stopped doing that , and instead we see the other and,, rather than what do we have in common? And I think it's more than we think, you know? Mm-hmm. And I, and I think that, I think that the answer has to be in coming together, like we're, we're, we're never going to be able to solve the, the problems that we need to solve as a humanity if we can't come together. And yeah. So, absolutely.

[00:54:39] Anne V Mühlethaler : It's funny 'cause the image I'm getting in my head, as you say, that is me holding someone's hand.

[00:54:45] Anne V Mühlethaler : I feel like I want to hold the hand of the world. Hmm. Yeah. Yeah, I, I feel that, sorry, 'cause thoughts were coming and then I didn't wanna hang on to any of them. Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, yeah, it was, um [00:55:00] hmm. I love Michelle Obama that's close on that. Mm-hmm. You know, I find that every time that we come together and every time we have a conversation, I feel lighter, heightened, almost.

[00:55:17] Anne V Mühlethaler : Yeah. Like I have an elevated state after each of our conversations, and not wanting to bring this back on myself too much, but one of the things that I loved about you mentioning the light we have inside comes from two places. The first one is because a few months ago I was chatting to this woman who's a, a regular loving, kindness practitioner.

[00:55:44] Anne V Mühlethaler : She's done a lot of years of practice as a, as a Buddhist, and she invited me to think of all of the people in the world who practice loving kindness as the Bodhisattva network. Mm-hmm. And [00:56:00] so the, the  Bodhisattva being , the beings who you know are compassionate and. Have permission to make the world a better place.

[00:56:09] Anne V Mühlethaler : And, and then we overlaid that with a concept that I'd heard of, but vaguely, which is the story of the Indian God Indra, that is known to have an Infiniti, a web that is as large as infinity and that it covers like a cobweb but fancier. , and at that every being is a part at one of the sections of the, the web.

[00:56:40] Anne V Mühlethaler : And that each of them is like a shiny gem and that each gem reflect each other. And so when I hear you talk about connecting to your own light and supporting others and how to make the world a better place. It's lovely. 'cause this was not even in my mind if I hadn't had this conversation, which was I think back in [00:57:00] February, and I don't think I would have this image to vibe with.

[00:57:04] Anne V Mühlethaler : But in itself, it gives me hope because I think of the refractory power of light and the mirror effect, and I'm very attracted to jewelry and gems and generals. It feels like a concept that really has my name all over it. And it gives me a sense that for every person that does good, that does support others, that does shine their light, that there is a positive effect.

[00:57:34] Anne V Mühlethaler : So it gives me, it gives me that sense of it's almost like I'm, I, I can hold onto something. It feels more tangible. The hope feels less thin. Yeah. Right.

[00:57:46] Libby Stockstill: A hundred percent. And I, I love that. I love that image. And I would say, I think it's true, even, you know, you said for people doing good in the world and, and, and I actually, I also think [00:58:00] it's, I think it is true on such like a small, like a simple, simple level too.

[00:58:04] Libby Stockstill: I think about, I don't know why this image keeps coming to me, but I think about the difference. Have you ever been on a call when you're running to the grocery store or running to get a coffee and you really need to stay on the call and you really need to be paying attention to the call and, you had this idea, the timing didn't work out, whatever, but you're checking out or you're buying your thing and you're totally distracted and you're not connecting with this person.

[00:58:29] Libby Stockstill: And I've thought to myself, there was a time I had zero awareness of this. And, and with the awareness comes, oh my gosh, I feel like such a jerk right now. You know? And, and. Flipping that to when I can have the intention of, I'm just not gonna, I'm gonna make sure that I'm not on my phone when I'm having these, these interactions.

[00:58:51] Libby Stockstill: And what's been funny is the beauty in these these small quick interactions. Sometimes it's just a smile. [00:59:00] Sometimes it's a, it's a, a joke. Someone, a woman asked me if I'd rather live on a houseboat or in a tree house. And I've been thinking about that question for like a month now.

[00:59:09] Libby Stockstill: I'm like, why did she not that? Oh my God, what did my first response mean? And, you know, anyway,

[00:59:13] Anne V Mühlethaler : but, but just, oh my God, I I would definitely do a houseboat. Sorry, I felt this felt like a question I needed to answer.

[00:59:19] Libby Stockstill: Yeah. Say more. Why, why did you choose the houseboat?

[00:59:23] Anne V Mühlethaler : Because I love water, so, I mean, it has to be Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[00:59:26] Anne V Mühlethaler : With a sail. So it's just a boat. But anyway, sorry.

[00:59:29] Libby Stockstill: Yeah. No, it's great. But, but just the, the serendipity of interacting with people like. The connection with people, I think is a huge part of what this is all about, and how we do make things better as, as simple and small-ish, as that example is, I've noticed a very big difference.

[00:59:54] Libby Stockstill: And then you think about what if I'm the person on the other side of that [01:00:00] exchange and someone is sort of just in their own thing going through, and I go through my day and I'm interacting with people that way. How do I leave, right? How do I feel when I, I get to the end of my day versus I'm having these kind of glow up kind of in exchanges with people, you know?

[01:00:18] Libby Stockstill: And, and anyway, don't get me too far on this, but I mean, it, it's also part of the world that we live in, right? Where I was in retail, right? And, and it's hard to be, it's hard to be on the front lines of interacting with people in any forum, , today. And I think about just the power of walking down the street and smiling at the person that's coming the other way.

[01:00:43] Libby Stockstill: And if you think about Indra's net and the reflections and the reflect refractions, what would it be like if we all just kind of took that moment to be just a little bit more present and a little bit more human?

[01:00:58] Anne V Mühlethaler : Yeah. I'm so [01:01:00] glad you came back to that because earlier in our conversation, this popped into my head.

[01:01:04] Anne V Mühlethaler : I don't know if you've heard of the work of Nicolas Kta. He's a professor. He was at Harvard, I think he's now at Yale, and he is a professor in networking science. And he wrote a book a few years ago called Connected, which is how I became aware of him. But, and it was obviously a big deal during the pandemic, though.

[01:01:23] Anne V Mühlethaler : I can't say I followed him at that time, but he was quoted in the TEDx talk, one of the two TEDx talks by the. The writer and professor Emma Seppala and I remember this 'cause I actually quote this so often. It's one of my pieces of feel good trivia. He has written a piece of, of academic data, saying that when one person acts fairly, it impacts three degrees away from them. Oh. So I cannot say, I cannot track the power of a smile, a [01:02:00] nod picking someone's groceries when they're falling down on the stairs or saying someone, oh, do you need a hand with that? Mm-hmm. I actually met a friend's friend on a Sunday morning in an empty park under the rain because she was wheeling like a massive trolley of things.

[01:02:15] Anne V Mühlethaler : And I was like, you need help with that? Yeah. So I helped her up for about five minutes and then. I went to, where are you going? And then we realized he was going to my friend's house. Oh my gosh. But so, I don't know. I cannot say that this has been tracked as well as what he has done with this work on fairness.

[01:02:33] Anne V Mühlethaler : But I have a feeling that any small act of kindness, gesture matters and has that reflection, right. Has that, that reverberation effect. At least every time that I sit and I guide a meditation and I can see someone who joins in late and I'm thinking, it doesn't matter, they're here. If they feel good and this changes them, then that's [01:03:00] going to have three degrees away from them.

[01:03:01] Anne V Mühlethaler : Someone's gonna feel it too. So this is my, maybe I'm wrong by the way, but this is my feel good moment when I give a class online and people drop in and out. I'm like, it's okay. You've gotten your 10 minutes of loving kindness. You'll be fine. You'll be fine. Well, you'll pass it on really, is what I'm hoping.

[01:03:20] Libby Stockstill: Well, yeah. And. Hmm. While we haven't done the research to be able to document the, I, at length, think about yourself. Yeah. Like what, what happens to you? Three degrees after the kind interaction.

[01:03:37] Anne V Mühlethaler : Sure. So it's talking about kind interaction. Someone's waiting to go on a walk. Oh. Hello. Hello. You're awfully cute.

[01:03:46] Anne V Mühlethaler : And I've been sleeping for six hours. Oh my goodness. I, I'm so beautiful.

[01:03:52] Libby Stockstill: I'm Nandi. Oh my gosh.

[01:03:55] Anne V Mühlethaler : Hello. I'm gonna keep in in my arms for a minute

[01:03:58] Libby Stockstill: while we back out. I, that just makes [01:04:00] me so happy. Our, our furry friends, our furry friends are here to, furry friends

[01:04:03] Anne V Mühlethaler : are really good for lighting our light, like in the light.

[01:04:06] Anne V Mühlethaler : Just watching him, like he's got a way of walking when he's a good mood, where he really has a strut. Oh yeah. I called him. Yeah. Like a stru attitude. Yeah. And I can watch his little bum and I'm like, oh God, the world is so good sometimes. Anyways, that's my, that's my stick and feel good moment.

[01:04:28] Libby Stockstill: I love that. And I, that makes me so happy when, when I, he's not

[01:04:31] Anne V Mühlethaler : licking me to say, yeah. Yeah. I'm that good.

[01:04:34] Libby Stockstill: Well, I was gonna say, so my dog will do this thing where she'll roll over, like she wants her belly scratched. And like, that's the other thing with shining our light. Right? How long, I feel like it's a lifelong journey of being able to say, this is what I want.

[01:04:49] Libby Stockstill: And I would like it right now. Like right now, I'm

[01:04:53] Anne V Mühlethaler : still learning to, I am still learning. Yeah, me

[01:04:56] Libby Stockstill: too. But bubbles, bubbles is like, yep. Right Now [01:05:00] please rub my belly. Oh, nope. Not enough. Like, I'm just gonna stay here until you, you know, and I, there's, there's a lot that we can learn from our, our four-legged friends.

[01:05:10] Anne V Mühlethaler : Absolutely. So before we close our conversation, I was wondering if you'd tell me if there's anything in particular that struck you or that surprised you about what we talked about? Did it go in any direction you didn't expect?

[01:05:27] Libby Stockstill: Oh, I mean,

[01:05:28] Anne V Mühlethaler : I think,

[01:05:30] Libby Stockstill: It's funny that we went all the way, you know, very early on, as I was saying, walking down the street, smiling.

[01:05:36] Libby Stockstill: I'm like, that's not a very far, path from walking down the street singing, where we started. And so true. Absolutely. Yeah. And I, I think that is

[01:05:53] Libby Stockstill: a couple things that, you know, that just the, the exploration and maybe it's the spiral staircase kind of [01:06:00] thing where you, you kind of circle and come back around. But also, and you've said this before, like loving long conversation and I love long conversation and I love not having to have a, and maybe that's another thing with all of, all of these considerations with shining our light with feeling comfortable.

[01:06:22] Libby Stockstill: I've noticed more and more as we go into kind of a soundbite, in the corporate world, you gotta say what you gotta say and be concise, clear, , all of those things. There's such an emphasis on efficiency, quickness, and I, I love the spaciousness of our conversations and, and where we're able to go when we're not forcing a linear or efficient structure.

[01:06:51] Libby Stockstill: So maybe that's what's coming up for me. How about you?

[01:06:54] Anne V Mühlethaler : That's interesting because, I really want this to feel like it's part of what we do [01:07:00] in this podcast, because I find, even though generosity is not it, for me, it feels like spaciousness and generosity is part of the feeling of Metta, that feeling of unconditional friendliness of goodwill, of benevolence.

[01:07:18] Anne V Mühlethaler : Yes. Yes. And so I like that too, because also I think it comes back to giving ourself the time to finishing our thought. Mm-hmm. I think, I think this still feels like I, it, it surprises me every time. Yeah. How not interrupting or letting ourselves go further. And further can just help us go to a different place in, in our thinking.

[01:07:50] Anne V Mühlethaler : And also, I feel, I felt very touched by how moved you were about the question that you brought today. I think that, I mean, I, [01:08:00] I know this to be true for me too, but that I'm gonna use the word validate that brought it on a different level for me. I think that it's, there's various ways we can connect with words and I think that we can connect with a question, hold on.

[01:08:19] Anne V Mühlethaler : I'm gonna let him go back on the floor and, we can connect to a question on a purely intellectual level. And I guess that even though I had never thought about it before, now, not really. I don't really want to just stay at the intellectual or conceptual level here. Yeah. So thank you for, forgive the pun, shining a light.

[01:08:42] Anne V Mühlethaler : On something that actually really matters. It's the, the question needs to be something that feels, felt and lived or embodied and experienced. It can't just be something that we want to just debate on. Yeah, obviously I, I think it, it goes with the show and people understand that [01:09:00] no one's landed here thinking it's a philosophy, podcast.

[01:09:03] Anne V Mühlethaler : Yeah. But at the same time, and, and there's nothing against it. I love philosophy, but, but, but here, that's not what it is. And, and feeling your emotion behind it really brought it home for me and I think it's gonna stay with me as a conversation, as a result. Thank you. So thank you for that.

[01:09:22] Libby Stockstill: Thank you.

[01:09:23] Libby Stockstill: And thank you for creating this space. I think you are shining your light

[01:09:29] Anne V Mühlethaler : so Well, what I'm hoping is I'm reflecting other people's light, so I'm hoping amplify and also make. Yes, people be more seen and heard, which is actually part of the whole, the whole light thing. We are really very, sort of enmeshed with each other, with those concepts without a doubt.

[01:09:49] Anne V Mühlethaler : And can you think that a few months ago I didn't know you, and a few months ago I also had not had that conversation about Indra's and here we are and, and for me [01:10:00] it feels like life makes more sense as a result of both these meetings. How great is that?

[01:10:08] Libby Stockstill: Yeah, it's so great.

[01:10:08] Anne V Mühlethaler : I, I'm very grateful for the internet.

[01:10:12] Anne V Mühlethaler : I know we, her said so much and there are so much difficult and hard things about it, but we would not been in, you know, in this conversation had we not met. And I wanna send my heartfelt gratitude to Tara Mohr for her wonderful teachings for. Her facilitation training. US two, A alumni would've never met I for taking this course again.

[01:10:34] Anne V Mühlethaler : How absolutely wonderful is that?

[01:10:38] Libby Stockstill: It is so wonderful. Yeah. And, and I, yeah, she's, she is brilliant and, and she, she brings together like-minded people on the other side of the world and, and what a, what an amazing thing and what, what a cool thing for her to get to look out and see all of the connections, just the magic that she helps [01:11:00] to create.

[01:11:01] Libby Stockstill: Absolutely.

[01:11:03] Anne V Mühlethaler : Libby, thank you so much. Have a beautiful rest of the day. Have fun with the healer this afternoon. Thank you.

[01:11:10] Libby Stockstill: This was beautiful. Take care. Have a good, you too. Bye.